Lydia Aswolf

I know.

I still haven’t gotten around to blogging about just why it was I was to be found running in heels with Suzanne screaming in frustration behind me, and her daughter, Laini looking on with confusion and fear.

Long story short; we entered a gas station together to get something to drink. If you’ve read “Dueling Debit Cards” on this very blog, you know Suzanne and I are vicious bitches about leaping in front of one another to pay first.

This was such an occasion.

Laini, who has never witnessed such madness, had no idea why her normally gentle and demure mother turned into a very good imitation of a demon, screaming “Grab my debit card and RUN!” Nor could she understand the spectacle of yours truly pounding (did I mention I had on heels) for the register with cash outstretched to the understandably apprehensive cashier.

I won.

The end.

In the meantime, on September 1st at 9pmPST, I am fortunate enough to be appearing with Donna Stewart (founder of Psi-Fi Oregon Paranormal Research Team) on her show, Psi-Fi talk radio…and I’m even happier to announce Donna will also be appearing on our show, Psychically Correct…will announce that sooner to the date, as am still in the midst of booking some amazing talent…and Donna is certainly among that number.

When you have a minute…check out her site: http://www.psioforegon.com/psifiradio.html

We’ll be taking callers, I do believe, so give us a shout, we’d love to hear from you!

Suzanne and I have decided to bring Psychically Correct back to life…not until September 15th, of course, for two reasons.

1. The kids need to start school, then settle into school.

2. Mercury goes direct on September 12th..and it’s ALWAYS a good idea to let Mercury settle down a bit before starting anything new…even if it’s kinda old, because Suz and I are old hands at radio now.

Soooo, what do we know at this point?

We know we will be broadcasting on blogtalkradio.

We know that as soon as more information becomes available on show (we are in midst of choosing lead in music, promos, short bio, and all that good shit right now) we will post it on my radio page here, including a handy dandy link you can grab to shoot right on over to the show.

We know we will have amazing guests on the show; that said, YOUR QUESTIONS are the most important thing to us; so we will definitely have on/off shows where we don’t have guests in order to devote the show to what you most need to know.

We are also deciding on whether or not to be present in live chat while on air; we could take more questions this way and have some really nice banter going on…but I’m a simple gal; while I can actually walk and chew gum at the same time, I have found to my dismay I cannot in fact, type and talk at the same time…so the negotiations will continue on that.

We know at some point, Suz and I HAVE to take pictures together…nice ones; professional ones.

I don’t like this.

Suzanne doesn’t like it.

I don’t like it because I hate the fuss of getting pics taken, and because obviously, Suzanne is way more gorgeous than me…so I go in intimidated by her looks, and grumpy because I am not photogenic.

Suzanne hates taking pictures, has the gall to believe she’s not gorgeous, and stubbornly refused to believe ANY fookin angle is the perfect angle for her.

To bribe her, and help myself out, I’m bribing us both by getting makeup done, hair, all that before getting pictures taken.

Which means she just looks better, and I’ll look like me.

Not good.

But has to be done…besides, I’m being positive here.

Making Suz take a few pics with me, but ALSO taking some updated pics for two reasons:

1. I believe you should SEE my ass aging; that updated pictures of the real me is raw, real, and honest…much like our radio show.

2. As I do have seriously top tier literary agents perusing my book, figure an updated pic can also work as a book jacket…I can hope, right?

It’s an ethical thing with me…and it shows you just how much your own stupid ethics and morals can trap you into a situation you really don’t want to be in.

Damned morals.

Will relay the scene that found me running in heels with Suzanne screaming in frustration and her daughter Laini, frightened and confused behind me…some other time.

Hope you can join me tomorrow night (Tuesday, August 10th) at 12:30pmEST…I really adore Reverend Bee..she’s by far the nicest Scorpio I know, and so very gifted…I was totally blown away last time I made a guest spot on her show by her uncanny ability to see which animal was lending you strength, and which animal might be beneficial to think on, to lend yourself their abilities. The link to listen is: http://www.revbee.org/ I believe we’ll be taking calls, so very much looking forward to hearing from YOU!

I just checked out Zoe Moons site, which I am immediately going to add to my links; not only is it one of the most comprehensive week ahead zodiac forecasts/horoscopes I’ve seen, but it’s written in a very accessible format; also her prices are seriously good for the kind of work an astrology chart/reading takes!

Zoe Moon is also going to be appearing with the Twin Psychics and myself on the Art of Healing, the link to get there is http://www.psychiconair.com/pages/6383128.php and lists the show airing live, as well as the number to call into so we can all answer your questions…so CALL IN

Have another guest spot coming up in the upcoming week; will blog about that soon!

To reach Zoe…and you SHOULD, lol…I most likely will…the link is: http://zoemoonastrology.blogspot.com/

This Friday, August 6th, from 8pm-10pmEST, I’ve been invited to make a guest appearance on the Twin Psychics CBS Radio show, The Art of Healing.

Sunhee and Chinhee are not just incredibly talented psychics, but also close personal friends of mine; and I can say without any hesitation whatsoever, that they are brilliant human beings in addition to their talents as psychics and healers!

 You can head to

http://www.psychiconair.com/ and check out the show on Friday night at 8pm, where it will show the Twins live on air and click on it, would LOVE to hear from you, as we will be taking callers!

Celebrating the birthday of Suzanne’s husband, who shall forever be known as Forky for his valiant and brave attempt to use the word “Forky” during a Scrabble game.

Brian, my husband, shall be known as Crutchy, for his courageous attempt to use that as word…but he was joking; Forky was dead serious.

Suzanne shall be known as Curry, for her attempt during her and Forky’s dating days to make him eat the hottest curry possible…all the while batting her oh so innocent looking eyelashes and telling him it was really, really good.

And me?

Call me Bert.

I’ve never had my eyebrows waxed before…but at every nail salon in the Houston area, the nail technicians all look at you and tell you that you’d be vastly more attractive (”You look pretty; very, very pretty”) if you got them done.

I was no match for the peer pressure on this; it took time, however. I fondly recall telling no less than three nail techs, when they whipped out the pretty through ripping hair follicles from those pesky eyebrows “I don’t care if they look like two caterpillars marching across my forehead!” Startled reactions ensued, and I enjoyed it…but they know how to upsell, these clever nail techs.

So I found myself laying back in a chair while a particularly outgoing nail tech laughed much like a witch cackles. She applied the wax, ripped, applied some more, ripped some more. Then it occured to her to ask how I was doing, and I said fine; after all if I’ve went through childbirth with no medication whatsoever…this was nothing.

Then she applied wax between my eyebrows.

Having never had my eyebrows done in any way, shape, or form before, I admit I’m naive.

It has become apparent to me in conversations with Suzanne and other women that they always wax this area.

That said, as my virgin eyebrows didn’t want to leave their positions, the nail tech had to reapply several times to get things to her liking.

After waxing came tweezers…which was okay.

Not thrilling…but okay.

It was when I heard snip, snip, that I was startled.

She was combing my eyebrows and then taking a small pair of scissors to trim them.

Again, this might be laughable to women who have been through the process; to me, it indicated that I might possibly be Sasquatch.

When she was finally done, she smiled and whipped out a mirror with a flourish for me to see the results.

I declined as gracefully as possible, to her shock and dismay.

I can say this; it’s the first time I’ve ever personally witnessed a smile melting off someone’s face.

When I saw Suzanne, she knew at once…and roared with laughter at my tale.

My eyebrows were smarting, and for some reason…

I was still stuck on the in between the eyes thing, and grumpy as hell about it.

So…

Just call me Bert.

Yep, I’m a hooker.

Latch hooker, that is.

This latch hook project is for Suzanne’s Christmas gift…it’s 30′ by 50′ and as you might imagine….in between clients, writing, and sheparding kids to pools, libraries, and all the other stuff you have to do to keep em entertained in summer…I’m also working on this.

Sure, I should blog more…but not seeing much that sparks a writing whirlwind blogwise right now…what I really need to do is head out on the town with Suzanne.

If I do that, there’s no doubt whatsoever I’ll have a plethora of stuff to write about…because I’ll be making news, God knows.

We’ll have to set a date…then watch CNN; we might just get featured!

Know this is sudden, but good buddy Craig Eugene gave me a holler to help him host Tarot by Mischa tonight…give us a call, we’re going to be talking about….about….whatever enters our mind to talk about; and answering your questions throughout the show at 8pmCST tonight!

http://www.themixtalk.com/

Here’s the other little hobby I’m picking up!

Suzanne’s son, Ryan wanted Pokeman cards, Skittles, and Reeses Cups for his birthday; so I obliged by making him a huge candy cake with Pokeman cards in a figure eight. Thank God I had my Chicago Bears shirt…and my nails done for a change…and most of all, you should be thanking whomever or whatever you worship that my face isn’t showing. Will have to post the snickers candy bar cake I made for Suzanne’s bday, turned out really well, less ginormous than Ryan’s candy cake though.

At some point, I’m fairly sure I’ll have a better post; hopefully when I finish up with my Martha Stewart phase, lol!

What have I been doing for the past couple hours?

See for yourself.

If you drool, head on over.

As you can see, I made plenty!